the end's not near

The end is so far away I can't even see it from where I'm sitting on my computer chair that mother always adjusts way too low down. Today I accidentally cut myself and bled all over the Sportsgirl counter whilst serving customers, hehe. I think someone took home a sweater with my DNA on it. Apparently I cannot begin an assignment til my hair is completely dry and oh hey, what a great time to clean up the mess on my table that took months to create! I have a bundle of yellow fur on my lap, and a cup of tea on my desk .. And I tell myself, time and again, that I will end this abusive relationship that does not even provide me with the slightest amount of self-satisfaction. You and your stupid gummy desks and crappy over-priced food and your bus lines, OH MY BANANAS YOUR BUS LINES, it's like that thing with the Chinese people and if they walked in a line the line would never end because that is how fast they procreate over there, and moreover it's so eerily ironic because 90% of UNSW students must be Chinese. This is going nowhere.

untitled

My appallingly unsuccessful, blurry attempt to say Japan - please don't go.

Nagoya, 2007 - GOOD TIMES.

sheer brilliance

'Man's basic vice, the source of all his evils, is the act of unfocusing his mind, the suspension of his consciousness, which is not blindness, but the refusal to see, not ignorance, but the refusal to know. Irrationality is the rejection of man's means of survival and, therefore, a commitment to a course of blind destruction; that which is anti-mind, is anti-life.

"Productive work" does not mean the unfocused performance of the motions of some job. It means the consciously chosen pursuit of a productive career, in any line of rational endeavour, great or modest, on any level of ability. It is not the degree of a man's ability nor the scale of his work that is ethically relevant here, but the fullest and most purposeful use of his mind.'

And this one is for you, the one to whom I owe many a hazelnut latte and salads full of avocado and other mushy foods:

'If some men do not choose to think, but survive by imitating and repeating, like trained animals, the routine of sounds and motions they learned from others, never making an effort to understand their own work, it still remains true that their survival is made possible only by those who did choose to think and to discover the motions they are repeating. The survival of such mental parasites depends on blind chance; their unfocused minds are unable to know whom to imitate, whose motions it is safe to follow. They are the men who march into the abyss, trailing after any destroyer who promises them to assume the responsibility they evade: the responsibility of being conscious.'

- Ayn Rand; genius, Objectivist and exquisite author of many a book, including The Virtue of Selfishness

sadness is my boyfriend

I have decided on a male baby name, Cooper, even though my child will inevitably grow into a non-baby with time. I am very tired and there are socks that have been sitting on my table waiting to be worn for over two weeks - tomorrow will be the day. She started it! Picking blistered skin hurts. Basket; basket-maker; guy who didn't bring enough money. I'm three and a half months in with a roti baby. TEFL/TESL please be my friend. These books are so dense. I cut myself a fringe. I miss Jessica Chu. MY FRIEND IS AN AWARD-WINNING POET! Will I be missed?

admit it, just admit it!

Who wants to play SPIN THE BOTTLE?!

Spin the bottle.

(Okay, so this is supposed to move, like a jif or a gif or a G6 .. but it's not. Life sucks.)

today, tomorrow

Pelvic pain
Suspender tights
Lunch no thank you's
Sliding horizontally across stairs
Wrinkly blisters resembling baby possums
I could walk down these stairs of words happily

Backspace - dislike
Lifts that are out of order
Mouldy bread (mouldy peaches)
"You looked like you had the shits"
Not knowing if you're more embarrassed or ashamed
A community of unwanted hairs congregating on the sofa
Dance dance dance, grind grind grind, fun fun fun, sun sun sun

MRP high 5
This is so you!
That's sad, don't ever say that again

so i don't venterator you, you don't venterator me

This makes me teary, every single time.

"No, you don't get it. I need it to be over, I need it to be over, because I can't take this anymore. Yes, I love Luke, and yes, I wanted to marry Luke, but I didn't want a life separate from Luke and that's all he could give me. I don't want that. If I'm gonna be with Luke, I want to be with Luke and he didn't get it, and I waited, God, I waited. It's like Luke is driving a car, okay, and I just wanna be in the passenger seat, but he's locked the door and, so I have to hold onto the bumper. You know, I'm not even asking him to open the door for me, just leave it unlocked, and say come in, but no he - he didn't do that. So, I'm hanging onto the bumper, and life goes on and the car goes on and I get really badly bruised, and I'm hitting potholes, and it hurts, I mean it hurts. So yesterday I had to let go of the bumper, because it hurts too much - it hurts too much."

Snakes, snakes, snakes on a plane, relentless snakes, snakes on a plane! [Fist smacking palm all the while, love it].